The month of January has been a big long story, and it’s not even done yet (January, nor the story). Today, has been the most difficult so far, but I can’t talk about today yet, I still have to catch you up.
With each step of obedience, God reveals the next step to me. This is how it has been since I said “yes”. For someone who is slightly Type A, and a planner, this has been a lesson in patience. The first week of January was very exciting, the second week was filled with confusion, and overall just very difficult.
January 10, 2018:
I didn’t sleep well at all. I felt like the Spirit was trying to tell me something, but I didn’t understand what it was. I just kept hearing “Wanza”. Am I supposed to reach out to her? I don’t know. I’m tired and sore, even though I am up, I don’t think I’m working out today.
And I didn’t. I laid down on the couch in my workout clothes, and fell asleep. Before I did that, I did a little research. Wanza was a woman in a business mastermind group that I am a part of. At the time, I didn’t really know what she did, as I hadn’t gotten a chance to know her yet. I looked up her site, and I saw that she helps people write and self-publish books. Am I supposed to write a book? About what? I’m not going to ask questions. I’m just going to obey. So I booked a consultation with her for the following Monday. I figured God would give me some clarity before then. He didn’t.
In fact, the rest of the week was just hard. The devil was really hitting me with everything, and I started to doubt everything. A cloud was just hovering over my head and I couldn’t shake it. The interesting thing was Becky was going through the same thing. We both knew that we needed to obey, and that this was a sign that we were headed in the right direction.
Finally, Monday arrived, and so did clarity about so many things, including the book. Monday I got clarity, Tuesday I had an entire book outlined. God gave me the vision for this book. He gave me each of the chapters, but He wouldn’t allow me to fill it in until I obeyed the other things he has asked me to do.
That hasn’t been at all as easy to do. Today, with many tears, I surrendered the last thing that he asked me to give up.